I know that I am opinionated. I enjoy a good argument! However I never thought that being opinionated was a bad thing. Now, looking at the definition in the Merrian Webster dictionary, I see that I am "unduly" adhering to my own opinions. Not only am I holding my ground excessively, but my attitude is in contradiction of moral or legal standards. I am immoderate.
Oliver Wendell Holmes is rumored to have said: The mind, once expanded to the dimensions of larger ideas, never returns to its original size. Whenever my socks come out of the dryer they look like they have been worn by Bigfoot. Like my attitude, I guess, they exceed just, usual or suitable bounds.
A friend is someone you like being around, and that normally shows itself in conversation.
Living in a shelter for the homeless, I am having difficulty expanding my friendships. Don't get me wrong, I've met some people that I truly respect and admire. However, not as many as I would like. I guess I'm a friendship hoarder. I found some useful tidbits on the Happiness Project website that hopefully may allow me to broaden my friendship network. I've only been at it a few days, but here's what I've discovered.
Ask getting-to-know-you questions
I was told that these questions often reveal a hidden passion. I began my survey with two getting-to-know-you questions: “What newspapers and magazines do you subscribe to? What internet sites do you visit regularly?” No one subscribes to a newspaper. Most have read the free paper, the Metro. The newspaper was designed to be read in 20 minutes. The features section contains a mix of articles on travel, homes, style, health and so on, as well as extensive arts coverage and entertainment listings. All the residents were excited to realize that I had a computer. They absolutely love the internet. The residents are abuzz about a site, where, usually, from 10pm to 10 am, you pay a set price (3000 yen) for all the porn you can watch!
Ask open questions that can’t be answered with a single word.
“What’s keeping you busy these days?”
Top three: Crack, alcohol, cards. They had no problem answering in one, two or three words.
Am I surprised? No, I suspected such, but I was blind to the degree of the problem. Many of the residents are recently released from prison. However, for those not moving from a jail to the dorm, substance abuse is often a cause of their homelessness. Addictive disorders disrupt relationships with family and friends and often cause people to lose their jobs. For people who are already struggling to pay their bills, the onset or exacerbation of an addiction may cause them to lose their housing. A 2008 survey by the United States Conference of Mayors asked 25 cities for their top three causes of homelessness. Substance abuse was the single largest cause of homelessness for single adults (reported by 68% of cities). Substance abuse was also mentioned by 12% of cities as one of the top three causes of homelessness for families. According to Didenko and Pankratz (2007), two-thirds of homeless people report that drugs and/or alcohol were a major reason for their becoming homeless.
Mental illness is also one of the biggest causes of homelessness. The inability to think clearly and fit in with other people makes them outcasts.
Ultimately, the condition labeled "homelessness" is best described as a state of "disaffiliation" or complete alienation from meaningful human relationships and the social support systems most people have working for them.
I am learning a lot. Yes, a friend is someone you like being around. Do I like being around a lot of the people in the dorms? No. Am I afraid? Of course, maybe even more so now that I am coming to understand their backgrounds. Can I make more friends? We'll see.
May I offer for you reading pleasure: When you are homeless you don’t have any stability
You may also enjoy reading: What is the fastest bird on foot?
I am by no means ready to die! So, with that fact established, let's begin at the beginning: See links for all the Genesis posts to date: Genesis Through My Eyes
In my not too distant past, if I were to see a street person, a bum, sleeping in a door front or on a park bench, I would have kept my distance and perhaps shrugged my shoulders.: He had the "smarts" to ask someone where to go, I didn't
Come back often to see what these piglets are discussing. Pork may be on the menu. Menu changes frequently.
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